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The crime of the century is that Twilight never gave us a shirtless Kellan Lutz
Emmet WOULD forget to put a shirt on around humans in 20 degree weather
A hoe never gets cold
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greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou:
is anyone whos in love with me awake
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couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name:
actually Rob has said he doesn’t like, go online much and he doesn’t google himself or anything related to him…could you imagine how fucking funny it would be if he just. Doesn’t Know about midnight sun yet. everyone in his life is too scared to bring it up. he doesn’t find out until months from now, in the middle of a live interview, and when a question about it comes up you can visibly see the kill bill sirens go off in his head
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Relatable.
Office Job vs Retail Job by @noobtheloser
Check out Confessions of a Retail Worker
Oh
#I told my mom once about the ‘lean / clean’ thing and she straight-up didn’t believe me #BUT SURELY THEY LET YOU SIT DOWN WHEN THERE ARE NO CUSTOMERS #she said to me confidently #oh mom
AHAHAHAHAHAHA “sit down when there are no customers,” that’s a good one!
THERE ARENT EVEN FUCKING CHAIRS
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I want a story about an Italian vampire.
No romance, no action.
Just 200 pages of “What do you mean, I can’t have garlic? Do you know where I’m from?”
TBH I think the main issue would be the mirror thing
have you ever met an Italian man
the amount of time they spend looking in the mirror jfc
#the more you think about it the more all vampire rules are just anti-italian rules#can’t go out in sunlight?? IN ITALY???#Can’t go near crucifixes? IN ITALY???
a bunch of pissed off vampires stuck in Venice because they can’t go over moving water
Not to victim blame, but you’d have to be a pretty bad Italian to even get turned into a vampire in the first place.
the only two places practically immune to vampires are texas and italy
Let me tell you of A Thing.

Lithuania has no vampires, I guarantee it.
Lithuania has one vampire, and let me tell you, she’s gonna be FURY UNLEASHED once someone gets her out of the centre of that crossterfuck of a burial point.
#never seen texas and italy in the same sentence before
(via @tchallabread)
Reblogging purely for Crossterfuck.